My longest hiatus from writing… I see my ghost in a glaring mirror with no drive, no awareness to move. Numb one minute, crumbled the next. Perhaps the compounded darkness black as pitch and oppressive as conscious death has also held captive my muse – the strength to outline, to conceive, to apprehend, to allow weakness of ineffable ends. But, as such, history repeats. A piece of my history still speaks partial the truths closer to what my current heart could render in its state of depravity…

My heart becomes my haven
distanced from my mind
who’s imaginatively created Eden
awakes to realities that bind

And yet I find too many seams
stretched too taut to break
as did dawn with my dreams
when light pierced me to wake

To abstain from defeat
I stifle my wretched heartbeat
and brave the life of morn
after love’s heaven is borne

Sweet dreams now I harbor
to hide love’s lonely fervor
at silent and distant chimes
that sound to love’s mistimes

c. 2000

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